December 30, 1999

Tonight the Square felt like an insane asylum. Traffic didn't move at all in the 40 minutes I was there. Scaffolding and jungle-gym-like contraptions towered over everyone. Kenny G. was 50 feet overhead. A network newscaster I recognized but whose name I don't remember stood high in the distance. All around I kept hearing tourists (like me) and natives alike muttering "Once in a lifetime," and "I can't believe I'm here," "Times Fucking Square," and "If it's this bad tonight it is going to be bloody awful tomorrow night."

It sounds corny, but Times Square on New Year's Eve, 1999, is a time and a place I have had in the back of my mind for my entire life. For as long as I've known what New Year's Eve is there has been this footnote about what a triumphant madhouse Times Square should be the night of December 31, 1999. Like the Square itself it has been a cultural magnet for whatever Dick Clark/Network News reason you can think of.

At times in this life I never thought I would see this. In 1990 and 1991 and 1992 (and 1989 and 1988 and ...) ... There were so many mornings I thought I might not make it this far. And if the last 2 weeks are any indication then this weight will sink my mind for as much time as there is left.

But today I stomped around the place remembering a conversation with Mark Stokes on the bus to school in the 3rd Grade when we talked about how old we would be in "The Year 2000." I'll be 32. I remembered promises made to certain people that I would meet them at a certain restaurant at midnight, January 1, 2000. There was an O. Henry story about two friends who agreed to meet at some date in the distant future, and who did so without realizing it. The line I remember best from that story is (paraphrasing) "He'll be here. If he's alive he'll be here." I remembered 1992, and drinks with a co-worker who talked about the 1976 Bicentennial celebrations and how New York City's celebrations that year made all the other cities look like children. He sat at home carrying on about what a kick-ass city this is, and how he could hardly wait for Times Square 2000.

I'm alive. Tomorrow I will be at Times Square again, for as long as is reasonable. I might bring my camcorder. My trusty Nikon digital camera is deteriorating quickly, but I'll bring it anyway. I got some pictures from tonight, December 30, 1999. New Year's Eve Eve, 1999. I should have brought my tape recorder to get all the "Once in a lifetime" comments.

Hey, self. You made it.