going out of business.

http://www.sorabji.com/1999/may/10/

changing my opinion on Dr. Laura

changing my opinion on canadians.

trying to get my cat to eat a bug, like she used to when she was smaller.

4-day weekend and I can't go nowhere! Fuck!!!

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patting himself on the back. Happy veteran's day, y'all. No need to thank me personally, your tax dollars are financing my day off with pay.

Looking forward to the new Lord of the Rings trilogy thats coming to the movies in 2001. I saw some set designs...sweet. Rumor has it that these movies are going to kick Star Wars ass. Can't wait to see Liv Tyler (yummy) as an elven princess.

sitting around my house. Gonna start working out again today with a totally new program. Really concsiderign having my mom order me a $749 iMac from shoppers advantage, cuz I am sick of all the bullshit windows 98 is putting me through every time I use my computer.

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Mark sure has been reading that Brautigan book for quite some time.......it looks like the trilogy that includesLike Watermelon Sugar. What a great book. Highly recommending the Abortion Romance, my fav so far........does he ever get up for the pissser

wondering how I put 3 entries on here yesterday. Soory

thinking i will go and catch Luna this weekend, also got my stereolab tickets......this will be my 6th time around, should be good. they had to add an extra date the first one sold out so quickly

i don't know. something is doing me.
something something something something.
dis@tr^^

(please)

!!

ess

felafel

watching an arts & entertainment special on the church of scientology. i'm kinda puzzled how l. ron hubbard ever got that crock off the ground. just looking at the guy makes it painfully obvious that he's completely full of shit.

stock video: l. ron sitting in an arm chair explaining his "philosophy".
darting eyes, nervous smiles, twitching hands.

he's babbling on about "engrams", "auditing", and "the reactive mind", but it's pretty obvious the only thing that's going through his head is: "heh. i can't believe these people are buying this crap. hello, malibu!"

isaac, my man, you got punked.

Stop putting on airs. Just say A&E like everyone else.

sorting out the things that need doing that I shouldn't put off anymore.

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encouraging Jim to pick up the Men 15th Aniv edition right away, there is a bonus cdrom and i need this issue to sel out.....run to Lambda and pick it up, you're the best Jim.

wishing some extravagantly wealthy sorabjiite would bequeath $50,000 to him, like... oh.. I don't know... say... on Monday?

:-)

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advising Jim that Nate the Capitalist can help him with that.

is grinning. If I get that $50K from Nate, then I'll buy every copy they have, Patrick. ;-)

Did you snap a notty pic of you for us fags yet? LOL

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as much as I would love to accomodate you jim, i think it might be a conflict of interest if i brought nudie fotos into work to scan them.

telling Patrick if *that's* all your worried about, you don't have to scan them. Just put em in an envelope and mail em to me.

;-)

I am such a shameless tease.

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goin' huntin, baby.

just got off the phone with my best friend. We compared notes on our lives, which are kind of at weird poles right now. i have money and a good job, but circumstances force me to live in a cultural backwater away from anything (and anyone)interesting, with no one to get into real conversations with. She, on the other hand, lives in Portland with a lot a firends around, but lacks money or a secure job. Plus, how shitty is this? She's going to be in Detroit visiting her family when I am in teh UP, then I will be in Detroit when she's up in the Lake Superior region, and we will totally miss each other.

Now i am really lonely. I was just numb before, but now it's fresh, and I miss having friends to go out to get coffee with and enjoy measl with and go to the movies and shows and the zoo...sigh. Not the porper mood for the friday night of your 4-day weekend, huh?

semillamatomgreenshow.zzn.com

Last night's Schlitx [tm] is making me poop funny... I had to get out of the shower 4 times to relieve myself this morn alone...
I went out dancing to shitty 80s music last nite... with my roomate's girlfriend. the dancing was slow and tight... and I'm wondering when her and my roomate will break up. Or if she has a sister... or why I'd even worry about it... I've always been a loner and had little need to chase/like. I'm usually the pursued. The forbidden fruit is always the sweetest.

Fuck.

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http://www.freespeech.org/zomb

I am watching Jinger type this message and answering the telephone, saying, "Good morning, Ben Franklin High School..."

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in need of:

a) another full time gig.
b) another full time woman.
c) a one way ticket.
d) a cagefight.
e) a beer.
f) all the above.
g) none of the above.
h) your mom.

i think i'm gonna snap.

Just checking in. Things at work are OK, the computers frustrate me some days. They might change my position to my betterment, and get me some real training. Or, maybe not. It's up to the school board.

"God created stupidity, School Boards perfected it." - Mark Twain.

Family is doing well, house is trashed. Having five compulsive gardeners over Monday to make grape vine wreaths.

somewhere between chewing my cuticles, cracking my knuckles compulsively, and licking all of the sauce from my dinner plate.

i'm still hungry.

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none.

what do you do when you find out that the only person you have, the one you love the most, the one you trust with your whole being... your best friend in the entire world... the person who taught you everything about life, who taught you to be all of the good things that you are... the one who is always there to save you, to pick up the pieces... what happens when your dad confesses to you that last month he stole $100 from you? what kind of a sick mindfuck is that?

sarah, dish.

i am awake at 7:30 on a sunday morning. going to portland. see ya.

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I'd say let it go, sarah. You got your $100 worth and then some. I'm sure at some point in your life you managed to deeply disappoint him too, but he didn't quit being your dad over it.

stairs at night. mmmmmmm

i'd say kill him, sarah. if you won't kill your father over a hundred bucks, then what has he taught you about living in the world?

i am looking from holland

hello

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just saw eXistenZ. pretty warped. Feel a touch of something coming on, vague brink of nausea and low energy. My growing hunger is starting to overcome it.

Sorry to hear about your dilemma, Sarah. Why would your dad do that? Does he have a substance problem?

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it's not about the fucking money. i could give a flying fuck about a hundred bucks or ten thousand bucks.

it's about American Beauty. it's about doing whatever the fuck you want to do, without fear of consequences, even if that means disappointing your family, your daughter, the oner person in the world who gives a fuck what happens to you. it's about making selfish decisions for your entire life and having your daughter love you unconditionally. it's about alcohol abuse and fast food. it's about taking your daughter's birthday money from her grandmother, instead of selling your motorcycle to pay rent. it's about not holding up your end of the bargain, about not being a part of a two-person team.

it's about saying Fuck You to love and to trust.

you really only have yourself in this world, and that's what this is about.

That's a shitty situation, Sarah. Having not been in a situation like that, I have no advice to offer, only a hope that the problem gets resolved - in your favor, of course.

relatively free of issues.

writing out a $50K check to Jim.

if my dad took $100 from me, i'd figure he needed it and let it go. if my dad asked me for $100 i would give it to him.

the guy gave me half of what i am, he can't be that bad.

Driving over to Nate's to pick up that check. BTW, just make that out to cash, it makes things easier at my bank.

www.thechecksinthemail.com

Driving over to Nate's to pick up that check. BTW, just make that out to cash, it makes things easier at my bank.

www.thechecksinthemail.com

a little confused, i just got my new stylus/cartridge from Panasonic/Technics and i am being given a plastic like stylus. The one I am replacing appears to made of some sort of metal or aluminum. Concerend about the quality of my replacement. But then again, it's gotta be better than the muffled right channel crap i hear now.

dear sarah,

let it be. forgive and forget. blame the victim. Weenieism in its most blatent manifestation. Consider the source; hedging the bets in case this comes up later in life. Casting no stones.

Alcohol abusers can NEVER be trusted; I know because I am one.I know nothing about parent relationships; i suspect they cannot be trusted either. this is only about you and yours, not anyone else or anyone else's father.

If this and If that. do whatever makes you feel ok. never mind the vapid sophomorisms.

1-800-DRLAURA...it could be worse thats all Im saying.

Browsing the web for the best webcams to put on the active desktop to give myself the illusion that I'm busy.

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http://www.straightedge.org/

remembering that Natorious has my mailing address.

WooooHOOOO!

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i'm at the library waiting for my daughter to get off work.......hi ,pjboy........i've got that e-mail address, too............see ya' all tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!

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My eyelids belch with effluvial afterthoughts when you tease me with jello and chicken rinds.

straightedge.org!

i know. i totally surfed that site. cool shit. he links back to mark too.

wishing my Clerks soundtrack would stop skipping. One of these long weekends I am going to have to sit down with the cd cleaner...

at work, lunch break. Going to spend the afternoon cataloging artifacts. Guh.

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thinking i will get seriously baked and sit on my roof and watch some "shooting stars" tonight.....

happy to have found this.
it will be added to my daily stops.

jealous, two co-workers saw Tim Burton and Martin Landou (?) at the coffee shop dowstairs yesterday....why can't I ever see cool stars like.

i wanted to tell them how fucking cool of a job they both did with Ed Wood.

Tribes of primitve hunters, with rhinestone codpieces rampant, should build pyramids of Chevy engines covered in butterscotch syrup to exalt the diastolic, ineffable, scintillated and cacophonous salamander of truth which slimes and distracts from each and every orifice of your holy refrigerator, Sears be its brand.

wondering what it means when you find scotch inside of an empty teriyaki sauce bottle, in the back of the tupperware cupboard.


i mean, why isn't it in the scotch bottle in the cupboard with the two bottles of wine?

broke. is in negative status with my bank. is fretting about asking a co-worker for a loan. is pathetic. is thinking it's bound to be my turn for a break soon, as in, "give me a fucking break already."

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trying to decide whether or not to have sex with my husband.

been a long time since the last time.

as a youngin I once took a legal pad and filled 3 pages with names of "lovers" - so very 70"s

been married 10 years- and obviously wondering why.

Mostly standard of living shit and just too terrified of "what's next"

HAVING TOO MUCH COFFE AND PRETZLES FOR BREAKFAST

we finally got a coffee maker for the office. An office of 70+ people needs a coffee maker, so now I am saving a few bucks and drinking way too much simply due to accessability.

This has been the only job in the world in which we have to pay for parking and we didn't have a coffee maker, up until recently anyway. We are fighting the pay for park thing, but it's a commodity around

excited, this weekend seems action packed,

Lydia Lunch, Khembra (aka karen Black ofThe Voluptuous Horror of Karen Black) and local performance artist/columnist Vaginal Davis will be performing a half a block from my house sat......and Stereolab is on sunday......YAYYYYYYY!

makin' friends!

mark, why do you have adult content advertisements on the payphone project pages?

that is seriously disturbing.

you've become one of them. man.

not feeling so good. just downed 2 advils.

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not feeling so good. just downed 2 advils.

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I made out with a boy I hardly know yesterday. What I was even doing in his room I do not know. I should be ashamed of myself (I know none of you can empathize with this, but I feel like I should be ashamed. it's very unlike me. and it wasn't even that serious.) but I'm not really. I mostly ignored him when I saw him today. It wasn't personal, I just felt shy.

If I have the opportunity to do it again next week I will. It's been a long time since I've "made out". Lately it's been jumping right to foreplay. Does anyone else see the fine line between making out and foreplay? No one I know seems to get it.

Two things I remember: (1) he was very easy to kiss. It had nothing to do with him as a person, just that his style was very simple and I was glad for it. And (2) he kissed my stomach. I never knew I was so sensative there.

This is very mundane compared to so many other peoples posts around here, but to me it's a big deal. If you knew me you would understand. I can't believe I did that. I can't believe I'd do it again. I'm not even really attracted to the guy. But it made me feel all sparkly when he kissed my stomach.

wondering where the ol' payphone pages are, anyway

hope you're better Melissa. careful with those advils they can mess up your stomach

Sarah you of all people saying that!I remember your Halloween,I think you are being cheeky:)Gee,I,m no expert,but I think if they get their hands down your pants and you get all hot..that,s foreplay.

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..is just back from Paris, (I was right, I do feel better now)and dreaming of the sky-eyed doctor with the english accent who took the sutures out of my chin when I fell in a department store two days before going. And, relishing every night of peaceful sleep I've had since coming home because inevitably I'm going to get all mangled and bent trying to stay alive and will fall back into my pattern of insomnia and general depression.


Until I can go back to Paris.

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drinking the richest, more flavorful coffee i have ever had in my life. sheila, i'm going to have to send you some of this stuff. it's better than the naked guy coffee.

if you think my experience on halloween is in any way related to pornography or adult content websites, you obviously do not understand what that was all about. at all.

better than the naked guy coffee? then i must try it at once.

an entire weekend before i get to go back to work, close to the yearned-for one.

i had almost forgotten about this silly part of it. yay for desire. for the end of all desire.

wondering why in god's name i'm sitting here on a friday night pumping countless cups of bad cornershop coffee into my caffeine ridden veins so that i can stay up long enough to get enough work done tonight so that i will better when i wake up at noon tomorrow and haven't gotten anything done because i'm too tired from working late tonight.